Notes From Church

I did something scary today.  I played a piano solo in Sacrament meeting.  I don't know why I always get so nervous...like I was seriously shaking up there.  It was the craziest thing.  I've practiced and practiced this song.  And I've played it perfectly in the the privacy of my own home.  But something about playing for a lot of other people is absolutely terrifying.  BUT I did it anyway.  And it was really beautiful.  I don't know if everyone else liked it, but I loved playing it.  My hands were so shaky at the beginning that I came close to messing up a few times, but I caught it.  And then right in the middle of the song at the key change, which is my favorite part, I stopped thinking and just let my fingers do their thing.  For just a second, in the middle of that song, I forgot about all the people in the building and only thought about the people who love me.  I pictured their faces and heard their voices and saw their smiles of encouragement and I played the heck out of that song. And it worked!!  Hooray!!

I know I'm supposed to play the piano.  I know that I've been given this talent so that I can contribute.  I know there's a reason I feel compelled to practice certain songs and that I'm drawn to certain music.  I walked toward that vision today and it worked.  

Silent Night/Still Still Still

Here's what I played...you can listen to it if you want, although this recording isn't me.  It sounds pretty close, though.  :)

It's kinda fun to do scary things on Sunday!

Nativity

This is how we spent the first weekend of the month, but it's been so busy around here that I never got to the part where I actually posted the pictures and wrote about any of it. 

Sometime near the end of October, I received a phone call from the Stake music director asking if I would play the piano during one of the 30 minute time slots of the two-day Nativity event that our stake holds every year.  I was shocked that she asked and excited to play and said YES without hesitation.  

This is such an amazing, spirit-filled way to launch the Christmas season.  I absolutely love it.  Beginning in early November, announcements are made in each of the wards requesting "donations" of Nativity scenes.  People from each congregation come to the Stake Center with their personal Nativity scenes to be used in a massive display during the first weekend in December.  There are so many unique and beautiful ways to depict the birth of the Savior.  

A day or two after receiving that first phone call, someone else from the stake called and asked if I would be on the decorating committee and be in charge of the living Nativity scene.      Yikes!!  I'm SO not the decorator type.  I agonize over the smallest things, and this was NOT a small thing.  I reluctantly said yes and hoped there would be people there who had previous experience (or at least a picture) that could help me.  

The living nativity scene came together beautifully (because I had A LOT of help.)   And guess who got to play the part of Mary in the living nativity?  Yep, that's my little Flowering Buttercup!  She volunteered for one of the hour long shifts during the weekend.  She was so reverent and beautiful in that costume, and her friend Brayden was the perfect Joseph.  People kept walking up to the stage to see if they were real.  

We went to the Nativity several times over that short 48 hours, both for our various responsibilities and also just to listen to the beautiful music and to feel of the Spirit.  I wish they could have kept it up longer.  It is an amazing way to testify of the birth of the Savior at this time of year and a great reminder of the reverence of this season.  

"Finding the real joy of Christmas comes not in the hurrying and the scurrying to get more done, nor is it found in the purchasing of gifts.  We find real joy when we make the Savior the focus of the season.  We can keep Him in our thoughts and in our lives as we go about the work He would have us perform here on earth.  At this time, particularly, let us follow His example as we love and serve our fellowman.

There is no better time than now, this very Christmas season, for all of us to rededicate ourselves to the principles taught by Jesus the Christ.  It is the time to love the Lord, our God, with all our heart - and our neighbors as ourselves.  

Let us make Christmas real.  Is isn't just tinsel and ribbon, unless we have made it so in our lives.  Christmas is the spirit of giving without a thought of getting.  it is happiness because we see joy in people.  It is forgetting self and finding time for others.  It is discarding the meaningless and stressing the true values.  It is peace because we have found peace in the Savior's teachings.  It is the time we realize most deeply that the more love is expended, the more there is of it for others.

As the season envelops us with all its glory, may we, as did the Wise Men, seek a bright, particular star to guide us to our Christmas opportunity in service to our fellowman.  May we all make the journey to Bethlehem in spirit, taking with us a tender, caring heart as our gift to the Savior."  

-President Thomas S. Monson

2012 Christmas Devotional

Unexpected Joy

On Sunday morning, I had the happy surprise of being ready for church long before we actually had to leave for church (that never happens) and I sat down to play the piano for awhile.  I played a few favorites and then started playing a Christmas song that I had played the previous weekend for the Nativity.  From the top of the stairs, Flowering Buttercup yelled, "Mommy, why are you practicing that? You already played it."  (Our true character is always reflected in the things our kids say, isn't it?  My kids are so used to hearing me only ever "cramming" for a special musical number that it throws them off a little to hear me playing just for fun.  I'll have to fix that.)  I resisted the urge to be offended by her comment and instead said, "Well, it's still December.  You never know when you're going to be called to play a special musical number."  She scoffed and went back into her cave bathroom because she was not yet ready for church, and I kept played that song.

While we were at church, I got a text from the Ward Music Coordinator...

"I'm out of town this week, but I'm looking for a special musical number for the last Sunday of December.  It's after Christmas, but we will still be doing Christmas music.  Do you have anything ready?"  

Yep, I'm totally serious.  When we got in the van, I read the text out loud to Flowering Buttercup and the rest of my kids who had over heard the earlier conversation.  They were sufficiently impressed, I think.  There was something about "super powers" and something about "predicting the future" and how did I think they would do on their finals next week?

This morning I sat down to play that song for a little while because I would like to avoid the procrastination/cramming technique I've tried in the past.  I know this song.  It's a challenge, but it's not impossible.  When I just let the song play itself, it's beautiful, but when I'm glued to the page and check and double check every note, it sounds forced and mechanical, and oddly, I make more mistakes.  This morning, I tried to just trust my fingers.  A thought crossed my mind for a second, "Close your eyes and play it."  What???  Are you kidding???  There's no way I can do that!!  But I tried it...for about three measures.  And guess what!  Those three measures were more beautiful and perfect than I've ever played them before.  But then fear and doubt took over and I had to open my eyes.  ugh...  The rest of the practice session was a mess.  

For a second I thought about Peter trying to walk on the water and struggling.  "And immediately Jesus stretched forth His hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?"  Matthew 14:31

There are things that I KNOW for sure just like I KNOW those notes on that music.  But every now and then, I feel like Peter.  I feel the wind whipping around me and the boisterous waves, and I start to worry that I probably should get back to the safety of the boat before I drown.  

And then I thought about the FEW times I've actually surrendered my compulsion to be "glued to the notes" in my life, and just let Heavenly Father take over.  I did that once when I gave a talk.  I did it when we moved to Texas.  And I've found that the most beautifully, unexpected joys in my life have come during those times when I was definitely NOT in control.  What would life be like if I closed my eyes more often and just let the music play itself?  How much more unexpected joy is out there waiting for me to stop doubting and just trust? 

Notes from Church

I substituted for the Primary Pianist today.  I LOVE that calling.  If I could pick my own calling, it would be that one...forever.  There is no better place to be than behind a piano.  I love hearing the kids enthusiastically singing those simple truths found in the Primary songbook.  And I love being able to set the tone as they come into the room.  

I also love hearing the Sharing Time messages.  Today it was based around this scripture...

"And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man."  Luke 2:52

http://figurativeartlivingmasters.wordpress.com/2010/12/20/del-parson-1948-american/

The sister teaching the lesson asked the children to think of stories of Jesus that they loved.  They thought of examples of him teaching, healing, and feeding people.  And they thought of his birth and his resurrection.  But then she said, "Do any of you ever think of Jesus as a child?"  None of the Junior Primary did.  They were all convinced that he started as a baby and then somehow magically became a grown man.  But the fact that He was a child, and that He learned and grew and "increased in wisdom" just like all of us, gives us hope, doesn't it?  Hope that we can be like Him.  Hope that Heavenly Father can work miracles in each of us.  Hope that we can someday be worthy enough to stand before Him and thank Him personally.   I'm so grateful for that little Primary Sharing Time message that put such a small thing into a much bigger perspective.  And I'm grateful to have been asked to play the piano today so that I could be in just that very spot where I could hear it.