Tomorrow the girls and I leave for a long weekend in Salt Lake. I don't like getting ready for trips anyway...as I'm sure you already know...but this one is making me especially anxious. Originally I was supposed to go to Utah alone to spend Conference weekend with Savannah, but Craig and I both felt like the other girls should also have the opportunity to tour BYU, see their sister, and attend Conference. A girls weekend with my three daughters sounds like a great opportunity that I would look forward to, doesn't it? Well, yes, unless two of those daughters have never really gotten along. Sharing a small car, a hotel room, one bathroom, and a lot of togetherness for five whole days with two strong personalities who haven't seen each other in three months could be surprisingly wonderful or it could be potentially disastrous. It's the "potentially disastrous" part that has kept me up at night. Why does rehearsing disaster come so easily at 4:00am?
Without a walk this morning, I had an extra hour that I hadn't planned on. I could have used that time for laundry or packing, or just to be ready earlier for whatever this day has to bring. But instead, I picked up this book on my nightstand...
The print is large. There are lots of graphics. It was a quick read. But holy cow! The amount of stuff contained in this little book!
Do you know what it is to doubt? Have you ever felt afraid? Unequal to the task, inexperienced, not good enough, destined to fail? Are you familiar with the great storms of life? Have you ever approached the Lord soaking wet and windblown?
In those sinking moments, you must remember what happened to Peter: "Immediately Jesus stretched forth His hand and caught him." (Matt 14:31)
Don't let doubt keep you from your potential. When the Lord extends an invitation to act, He will not lead you into a situation that will destroy you. He will reach your reaching. He will be there to make sure you don't drown. As the storm rages around you, He will whisper words that instill confidence, "With me you are bigger than this. Trust me. Focus on me. I know your potential."
And He will calm the wind.Well, if He can calm the winds and the raging sea, He can surely calm two competitive sisters, right?
I still can't see anything but the potential disaster when I rehearse this weekend in my mind. But I know for sure that I wasn't delusional when the thought occurred to me to bring the girls on this trip, nor was Craig when he agreed that it was a great idea and bought two more tickets. I know for sure that it is a righteous desire to want your children to be friends. I know for sure that we will be in places where the Spirit will also be this weekend. And I know that the Lord has not set me up for disaster. He has set all of us up for success. And therefore we are entitled to His help.
So, for the next 24 hours, at least, I'm going to stop rehearsing this weekend in my head and just start packing for it.
And, it has stopped raining, so I'm also going to go for a walk with my friends.
What an unexpected blessing to have an extra hour in my day, to have that book appear right when I had time to read it, and to have it speak peace to my anxious heart.