Scary Things II

Do you know how many conversations I've had in the last week about being brave, doing scary things, taking chances, and not holding back.  I feel like I'm on repeat lately.  And whenever that happens, it's always because I need to listen to my own advice. 

I cringe lately when I hear people (especially my own children) talk about not trying things because they sound hard or scary.  I am compelled to quote Eleanor Roosevelt on a regular basis.  (Do one thing everyday that scares you.)  And I have multiple YW lessons swirling around in my head on the subject of listening to inspiration and ACTING ON IT!  Guess who needs that WAY more than the YW??  

I'm not sure what scary things I'm supposed to be doing or what I'm missing because I'm not listening, but I feel them pulling me.  Every now and then that's an actual physical feeling like a tug.  Or in this case...a heave.  I can feel that I'm not swimming in the right direction.  I'm not even swimming at all right now...just letting the strongest current move me wherever it wants to.  I've been flying on my own lately...just trying to stay afloat this month because it's so stinkin busy, and missing a lot of the important things because of it.  Those tugs that I feel and the dreams I keep having are telling me that it's time to focus again.  I am too far away from where I'm supposed to be.  Time to swim back. 

Earlier tonight I was having a conversation with someone and I immediately thought I should tell them what I always used to write at the end of all of my blog posts...except I couldn't remember what I always used to write!!  I could remember a little of it, but not the whole thing!  GIANT SIRENS immediately went off IN MY HEAD!  You are too far away.  Come back. 

I have no idea what scary things the coming days and months will bring, but I am turning around to go and find out.   Right now!

And I found that thing I was looking for...buried in some obscure box in the back of my head...

BE GOOD.  BE PATIENT.  DON'T FORGET.   

6th Grade Splash Bash 2012

I spent the day with a whole flock of 6th graders.  June is graduating from elementary school this year and to celebrate 7 long years of hard work, the 6th graders have an end of the year SPLASH BASH!

I got to the school at 8:30 to walk with the group to a nearby subdivision clubhouse where giant jumpy toys, games, and food had been set up for the kids.  

 We had a serious OCEAN of 6th graders walking down the street!

 

 I spent the first half of the day working the dunk tank.  So much fun!!  And SO wet!!

 ...and they let me dunk June!

 Loved this DJ/Referee...super high energy guy who kept the kids engaged in all the activities

 I think June was checking out her competition for the tug-of-war...

 

guess who won???

 yep...the girls!! :)

Everyone had such a great time and I was so happy I got to be there to hang out with June and her friends all day.  These are great kids.  I'm so excited for their middle school years...

Togetherness

I had grand plans for last night.  I started early on a crock pot dinner to ensure that we would all be sitting together around a table.  I made homemade everything! including ranch dressing that was super yummy, and a dessert I stole off Pinterest.  And I had visions of the six of us spending the evening writing down our summer goals and planning great activities that we could all look forward to.  

Unfortunately, at 3:00pm, I realized that I had forgotten Spell Girl's solo practice with her accompanist at 5:00pm and her recital at 7:30pm.  And I also got a text from TCD saying that she would be going to a friend's house after school to work on a speech project.  ugh...

So, instead of the togetherness I planned, five of us ate dinner...mostly around the table.  And from 5:00pm until 7:30pm, we ran back and forth between Dallas Strings, an apartment complex in McKinney, and our house.  No summer planning happened last night.     

But we ALL went to Spell Girl's bass/cello recital.  It's rare that we ALL attend an event together.  Usually we're going in 6 different directions and we're lucky to get one or two of us at any given activity.  And sometimes, the other kids aren't always interested in the things their siblings are doing, so we've been guilty of giving in and letting them stay home.  But, I think if I could rewind and change one thing about the way we've set up our household, it's that one...I would just make it a requirement that we ALL support one another whenever possible.  It was such a great feeling (for me and for Spell Girl) to look across that whole row and see smiling family faces.  

She has worked so hard this year learning that new instrument.  We all have the benefit of hearing her practice (and it is TOTALLY a blessing to have that gorgeous music fill the house), but it's a different thing entirely to be there watching her perform for a whole audience full of people.  The other kids were excited for her, and a little surprised, I think, at how good she really is.  TCD and the Scout Master were sitting behind three of the older kids in the conservatory who are very, VERY advanced, and they both were so excited to tell Spell Girl that those three kids were very impressed with her performance.  

It's a good thing to have your brothers and sisters see you excel at the thing you really love.  I think it makes them think differently about each other.  I'm so happy that we accidentally ended up in the same place together so that we could ALL enthusiastically cheer for Spell Girl.  Because what better cheerleaders will we ever have than our own family??

Oh, and by the way...Spell Girl got an award last night for Exceptional Progress in her private lessons AND she found out today that she made 2nd chair in Chamber Orchestra at school (That's the highest one!  She'll start there in the fall.)  Can you hear us all cheering over here?    

Summer Goals

I'm a goal oriented, planner, list-making kind of a girl.   There are calendars and bulletin boards and grocery lists and weekly menus sprinkled around the house because we all seem to function better when we know what's coming up.  I set new goals every September and every January, and sometimes every Monday when necessary.  I like to be able to SEE what I've accomplished and FEEL like I'm spending my time doing things that matter.  And I think my kids like those things, too.  


Even though we're all anxiously awaiting the beginning of June and the end of this hectic school year, we won't JUST be relaxing.  I prefer to think of it as productive vacationing.   Summer is the perfect opportunity to do all the things we really want to do, but don't have time for during the school year.  


Typically, we spend one Monday night right before summer starts, letting the kids just brainstorm what they want their summers to look like.  We let them write down everything they would do if they could create the summer of their dreams.  And then we add a few suggestions...some spiritual things, a little physical activity, and a few things to keep their brains from turning to Jello before August.   


This morning while I was looking for something in the kids' files, I found a few of their old Summer Goals...

This one totally made me laugh...I can't even remember why the Smithfield McDonald's was such a big deal...but I do remember going there that summer.

 Only a few things are crossed out, but she actually did all of them...even getting the KITTEN from Kjersti (in fact we got TWO kittens that summer.)

By 2008, all 4 kids had Summer Goals, so they kept their handwritten ones in their rooms and I hung this one on the fridge.  We didn't actually make it on an airplane or to Disneyland or Sea World, but I'm a big believer in dreaming big.  The more you let yourself hope for the big things, the more likely they are to actually happen.  

I'm so excited to see what their lists will look like tonight.  I'll make sure to post updates...

Scary Things

This morning, TCD needed to do something scary.  If I told you what it was, you would probably think it was silly, and she would be mortified, so I'm not going to copy the entire text conversation for you to read.  But let's just say, it was a big deal for her.


I gave her some suggestions about what to say, and some confidence building words of encouragement, but she was still really nervous about it.  

(I'm inserting in this space a tiny little side post about HOW MUCH I LOVE my iPhone!!  There are some pretty amazing things that happen on that thing and sometimes I want to save them forever.  And by pressing two little buttons at the same time, I can do that now!  Love that thing!)


I also LOVE that Eleanor Roosevelt quote.  It's been awhile since I've needed to hear it or say it.  (And you should probably know that the text right after that last screenshot says "Mommy, you're such a nerd!"  Not everyone in my house appreciates Eleanor as much as I do.)  But it was nice to be reminded today that sometimes scary is good.  


I'm so proud of TCD for doing something that terrified her today.  It doesn't matter if it's a small thing like sending a text or a big thing like moving across the country.  We should do something scary everyday.   There are a million great adventures and huge blessings that happen when we just jump.   I'm going to channel my inner Eleanor Roosevelt today and find something scary to do.  You should, too.  Be brave!!

Savannah's Room

Today is one of those days that I think I could write a few dozen posts.  I'm not sure why some days I feel totally filled with gratitude for absolutely every little thing, but today I do.  I wish I could bottle this for those days when I don't love everything as much.  

This morning, I walked upstairs to put a few things away in Savannah's room and I just sat in there for awhile.  I love just parking myself in the kids' rooms every now and then when they're not home just to see what they look at and how it makes them feel.  

Savannah's room has an amazing warmth in it...always.  The other kids' rooms do, too, but it's different in Savannah's.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe because I know how her head works and how she thinks better than the other three.  Maybe because she spends hours reading the scriptures in there and writing in her journal and creating goals, and I can feel that when I walk in.  Maybe it's because her room faces in the direction so the sun pours in through her window every morning (whatever direction that is) so it's always warm and pink and glowy.  

Whatever the reason, I lingered in there for a long time this morning.  I'm so grateful that I have the luxury of doing that during the day.  I'm grateful for the 6 hours a day that are almost exclusively mine to fill with whatever I want.  Today is filled with Savannah, pink glowy things, a clean kitchen, sparkly toes, and huge amounts of gratitude for the people who love me.  

June

Do you know why I love June today?  (Not my daughter, June, although I do totally love her, too.)  I love June, the MONTH, because when June gets here, that means May will be over.  It's rare that I sit around wishing the days away, but this month is really starting to wear me out.  Why does everything have to be crammed into the last 4 weeks of the school year?  Recitals, plays, field trips, graduations, auditions...plus the usual spring schedule...baseball games, music lessons, Wednesday night craziness, and 2 holidays!  


It's insanity around here lately.  Tonight we had a bass lesson, a baseball game and a choir concert with 30 minutes of torrential rain in between...just long enough for me to get completely SOAKED while I ran to the van!  The rest of the week looks just as chaotic...golf lessons, NJHS induction, Six Flags Orchestra Trip, Father/Son camp out...can you see why June is so appealing right now? 

But, even though my calendar is COVERED with scribbles, I love that it means there is life in my house...happy, active, abundant life flowing from every single corner.  I love that the next 12 days of school will provide opportunities for the kids to make memories and have new experiences.  In the next three months, I will have a daughter at the high school, two daughters at the middle school, and my baby will be in 4th grade.  TCD will learn how to drive a car this summer.  June will turn 12 and become a Beehive next month.  The days and years are moving so quickly, I can barely keep up.  I look forward to heavenly assistance as we plow through all the things on that calendar, and lots of reminders to slow down and be mindful of all of those activities, so we don't miss a thing.


And then, in June...we can relax by the pool and think about all the great memories we made!

Mother's Day

Top 10 Things I LOVE about Mother's Day...

10.  Breakfast in Bed

June woke up at 7:00 this morning to make breakfast for me before church.  I love that she did that.  It didn't even really matter to me that I don't love peanut butter or that I don't usually eat breakfast on Sunday mornings.  It was the BEST way to wake up EVER!!

9.  Hearts!

Last night, TCD and Spell Girl babysat 8 kids for 7 hours.  They got home at 1:30am!!  And THEN...they stayed up for another hour cutting out little hearts, writing sweet messages on them, and taping them up all over the kitchen, even though we all had to get up at 7:30 for church today.  Amazing! 

 

8.  Special Mothers Day Music in Sacrament
This morning, we had two amazing youth speakers who talked about their moms, and then the Primary sang We Often Go Walking and When We're Helping We're Happy (I love the tra la la la part in that song...so sweet!)  Right after the Primary, the youth sang which is always my favorite!  I got to play the piano for them, too, which is the best! because I get to be right up next to them and hear their beautiful voices.  

7.  Taking Naps on Sunday Afternoon
I always love Sunday naps.  But guilt free sleeping in the middle of the afternoon and not having to get up and fix dinner is even better!!

6.  Boston Creme Pie

It's such a bad, blurry picture, but it totally doesn't matter because it tasted SO good!!

5.  Hilarious Mother's Day Cards

4.  Cute Pictures Taped on my Door While I'm Napping

3.  Texts, Emails and Phone Calls
Yesterday I talked to my sister-in-law for an hour.  I love catching up with her and hearing about her insanely crazy, super fast paced, glamorous life.  This afternoon I received a million texts from people who I love wishing me a Happy Mother's Day.  And in a few hours, we'll call my mother-in-law.  I love that holidays bring everyone closer together...even when it feels like we're a million miles apart.

2.  Primary Necklaces
Several years ago, when all of my kids were still in Primary, they made cute little necklaces as Mother's Day gifts.  They each gave them to me in tiny little envelopes and I carefully put them in a safe place so that i could wear them every Mother's Day...except for June's. 

Somehow, hers got lost that year and I always felt guilty just wearing the other three, so I didn't wear any of them.  Last night, June saw the others and asked if I was going to wear them for Mother's Day this year, and once again, I told her no.  

Sometime between that conversation and this morning, she dug around in my scrapbook stuff, found some beads and a picture from about the same time as the others, measured a black ribbon the same length as the other necklaces and re-created something pretty darn close to the one I lost in 2005.  So, I happily wore all FOUR of my Primary necklaces to church today!  

1.  I LOVE being a mom.  I LOVE that my kids are still young enough to sing songs to me in church, but old enough to be thoughtful and come up with amazing gifts on their own.  I LOVE that they still like hanging out with me and that they all pile in my bed, or on the couch, or around the kitchen counter to pour out the details of their days.  I LOVE that these four people who live in my house call me mom and say my name 4 million times a day.  I am so grateful to be a mom everyday, not just on Mother's Day. 

Reminders

I've been struggling with a thing lately....like REALLY struggling.  There are a handful of girls in Young Women's who occasionally miss Wednesday night activities.  It's becoming more frequent with a few of them and I've had a really hard time being compassionate about their decision to not be there.  In fact, last Sunday before our combined lesson, I actually lectured the girls about how there's no better place for them to be on Wednesday nights than at mutual activities...and there might have been a little more than that.  And then just this past week, I got into a bit of a heated discussion with one of the girls in my van when she said, "Homework will lead to college and a good education and possibly a job, so it's always more important than playing volleyball on Wednesday nights."  Do you know that I actually challenged her right there in my van with 5 other girls listening??  And I was so riled up about it that I totally didn't back down...and she's 12 years old!  Nice example, huh?!

Tonight, I was catching up on a few of my favorite bloggers' postings for the week and I found this...

I wanted to ask your opinion about sports vs. weekly mutual activities. My kids are still too young to worry about this balance, but I serve in the Young Women at church. Some of our girls miss months at a time because of sports, band, etc.

When I was working with the youth I felt sad for them when they missed because it's so fun to have that camaraderie and spiritual boost during the week, but sometimes families decide other things need to come first and I completely respect the family's choices about that.  I just always wanted to be sure everyone knew the information, knew we could come get them if they needed a ride, and mostly knew that we loved them and supported whatever they were doing.  If someone was busy in a sporting season we would all go watch them and support them.  Youth just need to feel loved.  I hope the leaders can support whatever decisions we may make with our teenagers when push comes to shove, but we do put a very high value on church activities.  I'm SO grateful for them and how they have helped mold my teenagers into the people they have become.  http://www.71toes.com/

I read this blog regularly and LOVE the things this amazing woman writes...including her answer to this question.   Hers is a much better attitude than the one I've had for the past few weeks.  As soon as I read it, I could hear that familiar voice in my head saying, "Haunani, you need to check your pride at the door!"  Tonight I'm going to get on my knees and repent like crazy, and then tomorrow at church I'm going to start feeling a little more love for these girls and understanding about their schedules, and stop petitioning for my own agenda.  I'd much rather have them aching to be at activities because they feel loved and supported than dragging themselves there because I've made them feel guilty and compelled.  I'm so grateful for that gentle reminder tonight about what's really important.  

   

Scriptures in Bed

I totally slept in this morning.  I NEVER do that...especially on a school day.  My alarm went off at 5:00 and I dragged myself upstairs to wake TCD for Seminary....and then I went back to sleep.  At 5:45, the Scout Master woke me up to ask where the keys to the jeep were.  I rummaged through my purse for an eternity, found them...and then I went back to sleep.  At 6:40, my second alarm went off to remind me to get up and make lunches, and start breakfast.  But I remembered there was cereal in the pantry and that Friday is a great day to BUY lunch at school, so I snoozed my alarm...and then I went back to sleep.  At 6:50, the alarm unsnoozed and I dragged myself upstairs (again) to get the other kids in motion for the day....and then I went back to sleep!  I didn't even hear the Scout Master and TCD come in the door at 7:05, and I don't know for sure that anyone ate breakfast this morning.  But at 7:15, I woke up with kids and scriptures sprinkled all over my bed and Mack reading Alma 18 out loud...


"And it came to pass that Ammon, being filled with the Spirit of God, therefore he perceived the thoughts of the King.  And he said unto him: is it because thou hast heard that I defended thy servants and thy flocks, and slew seven of their brethren with the sling and with the sword, and smote off the arms of others, in order to defend thy flocks and thy servants; behold, is it this that causeth thy marvelings?"  Alma 18:16


What a great way to wake up in the morning...surrounded by family and scriptures!  I love Ammon today, because he is an example of strength and humility.  I love my kids today, because even though there are 14 agonizing days left of school, they're still getting up, still doing homework, and still reading scriptures.  I love the Scout Master today, because he picks up the slack when I decide to take a break and because he improvised today and just had everyone pile in the bed!  And I love that bed today...

normally, I would NEVER let anyone see my bed unmade and a mess like this, but today this mess makes me happy.  I'm thinking about just letting it stay this way all day long...then maybe my family will all pile in it again after school.